Story: Mario was determined to learn Spanish. He started to wake up every day to study at least one hour. First week, second week, third week, he was determined to succeed. Until one day when he decided to watch a movie in Spanish. He did not get a thing. Next week he missed three days of studying. The following week he gave up. Why should he make the effort when everyone knows that to learn a language you need to live where they speak it? Why should he try again when he had forgotten everything already?
In this life there is only one thing that I am certain of:
"Your worst enemy is your brain"
Nobody else has so much power of convincement. Nobody else can stop you of doing things you want to do. Nobody else lies so well like your brain.
This article will explain a truth that most of you did not know. The truth that your brain loves his comfort zone and will try to discourage you of anything that goes against his comfort zone.
The capability of realizing that your brain is messing with you, is one of the hardest thing to learn. Any professional can tell you again and again what you should do but at the very moment that you are alone, your brain will start his own lesson.
These conversations with yourself are the ones that nobody else can reach. Only you, only yourself. That's why they are so dangerous, because if you are not aware, you would just submit to his desires.
Let's put one example. You wanted to lose a bit of weight but you gave up because it wasn't working. Let me rephrase an internal conversation that you had with your brain.
I have been eating healthy the complete month! I have been doing sport like an athlete and I didn't lose almost anything! There is no fun in this life, I want to have a couple of beers with my friends and I can't because I am on diet. Living like that is not really worth it, better to have a couple extra pounds than to life a miserable live.
That's your brain talking to you. You wanted to lose weight because you wanted to feel better about yourself. Now your brain is telling you that this is not worth it. Why? Because your brain loves the comfort zone. Pull him away from there, and he will start
You need to understand that all the conversations that you have with yourself can be very harmful. The reason is because you are not able to distinguish what you want of what your brain wants.
In the previous example, do you recall thinking why you started to lose weight? Did you think about the feeling you would have stepping on the scale and seeing your desired weight? Or the feeling of regret once you realized that you did give up?
No, you did not. Or better, your brain did not talk to you about it. Because it wasn't his goal. His goal wasn't to learn Spanish or lose weight. His goal was to stay in the comfort zone.
Every time that you feel lazy to start, weak to keep going or ready to give up … remember, it is just your brain trying to pull you down. It is not you doing what you want.
Here is a very good checklist to avoid this:
Following the previous example where you want to lose some weight:
Scenario: Bad day at work. You arrive home. You want something sweet to cheer you up.
Brain: Eat the cake, you will feel better. One day is one day. It's only because you had a bad day, not because you are weak. Do it.
Reality: You had a bad day, if you decide to eat that whole cake, you know that you will feel better 1 minute but afterwards you will realize that you still had the same bad day and apart from that now you feel bad because you made a step back in your goal of losing weight. So you decide not to eat it and to keep going, it was just a bad day.
Being emotional intelligent means being able to distinguish what you really believe of what your brain tells you. Your brain will play with emotions, past experiences, desires, coincidences, everything on his hand to make you come back to the comfort zone. Here is what you need to stay strong and teach him. Magic happens out of your comfort zone.
Story: Mario was determined to learn Spanish. He started to wake up every day to study at least one hour. First week, second week, third week, he was determined to succeed. Until one day when he decided to watch a movie in Spanish. He did not get anything. Next week he kept studying. He did know that it takes time and effort to speak a language. He did not know when he would be able to watch the movie and understand everything, but what he did know is that giving up, wouldn't help in any way to achieve it.